Boy Troubles
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The Ex-Wives Club
I was a stupid newlywed once. I was on what I like to call my starter marriage, while my new hubby (Rat Bastard) was on round number two. And while it pains me to admit it, I was a terrible second wife, but not towards RB. I was absolutely horrible to his ex-wife. Circa 2002, over two decades ago. I was a naive college student when I met the man who I thought would complete me. I was only 21 years old, and he was eight years my senior. I brought to the relationship a recently broken heart (thanks to my high school “sweetheart”) and a spotted cat named Barclay.…
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Rage Gardening
This is not a story about gardening. This is the story of Captain Douche. Please allow me to preface this by saying that I make terrible choices in men. They have historically been so terrible, in fact, that after the twins were born (almost five years ago), I swore off dating. I needed a detox. I no longer trusted any of my decisions. And also, raising twins as a single mom is HARD and who has time for going on dates? Prior to meeting the Captain and subsequently getting knocked up, I went on a series of terrible dates. I was an online serial dater, meaning I was going to…
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The Date-aholic
I used to be a serial dater. After my divorce over a decade ago, my entire mission in life was to get someone (else) to put a ring on it. For a girl who never envisioned herself being married in the first place, I was suddenly very afraid of being alone. I told a friend of mine today that despite being married (and divorced), I have never been proposed to. My ex-husband unceremoniously asked me marry him in the mall marking lot shortly after we bought an inexpensive engagement ring at the jewelry store. And by “asking me to marry him,” I mean that he handed me the bag that…
